Cartagena, Wednesday

Wed 1649 Promising start to day but feeling mildly shitty.

Got up for breakfast, today a strangely gelatinous bread roll (quite nice, but odd to me) and coffee. Came back to faff in room for maybe an hour and read up before heading out to Castillo San Felipe de Barajas. I had checked on the map and knew this was close but felt a bit edgy walking along the street between hotel and there with few other tourists. Nothing happened.

Anyway, after feeling a bit jittery about ambulant vendors etc round the entrance I paid my 25k and got in. I had taken a 500ml bottle of water with me, as advised by eg web beforehand, and while I did drink the bulk of it I would probably have got by without it. It was however good to have it in my hand to help discourage mildly aggressive water vendors.

The castle (as I will call it here) is pretty impressive. I watched the film in the old soldier's hospital 1.5 times (I came in part way through and watched the entire film when it restarted), quite informative. The aircon in there was also very welcome. (It was/is hot today as usual, although not unbearably so, I expected to be finding it way more oppressive than I have.) On the way out I was about the last out as I stayed in my seat to have a quick look at the map I'd been given when I got my ticket, and for some reason by the time I got to the door there was an enormous stream of people all coming in together. So I ended up stood behind the door (in the relatively dingy room, as it was showing film) and peeking my head round to see if the stream had finally finished, and I ended up having a brief conversation after one woman said I gave her a scare lurking behind the door like that - I apologised and I think it was all quite amicable.

Nice views over the city and I did a bit of meditative staring. I went over the whole place about twice, I think. The long underground tunnels were quite creepy (and it had occurred to me, before the incident in the hospital, that someone could be an arse and hide in one of the side alcoves and leap out to give you a scare; this didn't happen), especially when (as was quite often the case) there was no one else around - though it's cool that it's not so busy that you're always surrounded by people, because you do get to feel that sense of isolation and the atmosphere.

In the main long tunnel there was a fork off to one side which went downhill quite steeply. This tunnel was about the right size for me to walk down, but narrow enough it would have been a squeeze/both-turn-sideways-and-hope job to let someone else coming the other way go past. And for no obvious reason the lights on the wall stopped at that point. I peered ahead into the darkness and turned back.

Later on I was in another tunnel with quite a lot of other people and there was another stretch with no electric lights, but people were using their phones as torches and going on ahead so I did the same, and in this case it turned out merely to be a short-ish stretch without electric light before reaching another lit section and the far end of the tunnel.

Armed with this knowledge later on during my second drift round I went back to the steeply sloping tunnel. I was a bit nervous TBH - if nothing else the prospect of dropping my phone and the light going out didn't appeal, if I stayed calm I could have got out in the dark just by following the upward slope, but it would have been scary and I might never have been able to get my phone back unless I found someone else with a light to follow down.

The passage turned a few corners which made it a bit more eerie. Going further down, the floor was covered in water and I nearly turned back but ploughed bravely on. A few metres past that point an orange traffic cone blocked the way and honour satisfied I was able to turn back (naturally imagining someone or something coming up behind me in the dark). I'm glad I did that, it was sort of fun, but as I say even though in reality there was no danger it did press a lot of the right mental buttons to trigger feelings of doing something risky.

So maybe about 2pm I set off back to the hotel. Out of pure paranoia I took the memory card out of my camera - I'd taken a lot of photos, none amazingly unreproducible but you know, they're a kind of souvenir and memory jogger of *my* visit, not someone else's - and put it in my back pocket just in case I got mugged and they took the camera.

The brief walk back to the hotel was *nearly* trouble free. At one point there were a group of maybe five guys hanging around on the street, and as I had to go through the fairly wide gap between them I said "permiso" and walked through. No collisions or anything. One of them said "Amigo!" presumably at me, but I ignored him and kept walking, and nothing happened, but still felt a little bit rattled.

Anyway, came back to hotel (as it was on the way anyway) and dropped off water bottle and faffed round a bit. I planned to go into walled city, withdraw some cash and then go for a late lunch/early dinner at Alain's (if that's what it's called).

So I was crossing the plaza in front of the clock tower where there's an entrance to the walled city and some guy (who I couldn't see IIRC as he was behind me) starts calling - I am *assuming* at me, but I don't know - "yo!" repeatedly and IMO mildly aggressively. I did my best to ignore him, but I may have shown some kind of fear or other reaction in my body language or gait. Again nothing happened, there are people around there but I was still in a mildly empty space. That left me rather disoncerted, and wondering what would have happened if I'd been on my return journey with a big wad of cash.

Anyway, I had checked in advance on Google Maps and seen there was a Banco de Bogota near the clock tower, so I went there. The inside was cavernous but didn't appear to have any cash machines. There was a little both area to one side of the main door, but they weren't BdB machines (go figure) and would only let me have 600k max (for the standard 13.2k fee) so I cancelled the transaction.

I then went up to Alain's which looked like it was shutting - tables/chairs stacked up a bit etc - but after (not helped by my jitters from the earlier incidents) some poorly understood Spanish exchanges they said they would serve me, though I felt a bit awkward. Got carne asada, although this time the salad came with some manky thin white dressing on so I didn't eat it, and there was a bit of spaghetti in a very thin/light tomato sauce which I was fortunately able to eat. I didn't get a bill on my table, probably as they were shutting, but I went up to counter and waitress told me 19k and I gave her 20k and didn't wait for a tip and she thanked me as I was walking off.

To avoid a repeat encounter with "yo" bloke I took a slightly different route back. Lots of people but few obvious tourists in street. Nothing happened but rightly or wrongly by this point I was starting to feel a bit on edge about being in the street at all.

I'm not desperate for cash but this had seemed a good opportunity to get some, and I could have stashed the wad in my security belt in the toilet at Alain's before returning home. So while annoying that's not a huge problem, and if I have to withdraw only 600k (I will try another cash machine another day, but I had just assumed BdB's branch would have their cash machines and hadn't identified locations of any others, nor did I see any on my walk to Alain's) so be it.

Right, I think that's the facts etc done. Let me take a bit of a break before going onto the "psychology" of feeling on edge here etc. It's 1722 now BTW, I plan to go out for a beer or two later but we'll see how I feel, and there's no massive rush, I probably won't leave til at least 1830 and maybe a bit later.

1731 Quick shower later.

Right. Lacking anyone else to turn to, I asked Google for advice. Almost inevitably there's a bunch of sanctimonious wankery sprinkled with borderline useless information. But let me waffle.

So coffee bean bracelet guy the other day is 99% (he just might be an eccentric millionaire or something, I suppose) running a standard scam which Google seems to associate with Rome. Guy starts up a conversation, asks where you're from, makes some comment, offers you the "free" bracelet. This - which I never got to the other day - is followed by a sob story (often about a pregnant girlfriend, apparently) and a request for money. Giving the bracelet back is refused as it was a gift. Technically you can probably just walk away, maybe throwing bracelet to ground, and they won't usually (but may) get aggressive (I think as in "threatening" , not as in "actually attacking you). Advice given for Rome at least is to just totally ignore the people - don't say no, just don't engage with them when they try to get into conversation with you - the article I read acknowledges this goes against standard " decent" human behaviour, but IMO (can't remember if article said this), influenced by Cialdini's book, once someone else starts abusing these rules to obtain compliance from you they have forfeited the right to "polite" treatment. Admittedly this is a slightly grey area because in principle a random person shouting "where are you from, bro?" in the street could be a genuinely friendly person, but we're not living in fantasyland here and I think it's fair to assume the worst (given "worst" here means you ignore the person, not that you shoot them because you think they might possibly be a threat).

On aggressive street vendors more generally, much bleeding heart commentary about "they're human beings too, they deserve respect, they didn't have the opportunities you did, blah blah" . And there's some truth in that. One site which mixed good advice with smug wankery did make the point you should be polite with merely mildly aggressive vendors. Say "no thanks" or whatever, don't be rude. That's fair enough. I can handle those guys. It's people like "yo" guy today and *maybe* the "amigo!" guy who bother me; they seem to be interested in stopping me from moving, in *forcing* me to engage with them. A guy says to me "sunglasses?" as I pass, I say "no thanks" , it's mildly annoying but he's got to make a living and we're totally cool. If he's the fifteenth guy in a row to try to sell me sunglasses it's annoying but that's not his fault and he still deserves a polite no. However, if a guy *detains* me by abusing the rules of politeness (which is what "Amigo!" guy would have been doing) to make me stop and engage with him, or who starts out being rude verging on threatening ("yo" guy) is as far as I'm concerned no longer entitled to a courteous response.

So having set out my philosophical position on this after being riled by smug wankery on net, what about the practical aspect? Rightly or wrongly what's *really* bothering me here is that these more aggressive vendors (or possibly just con artists or potential muggers; I have no idea what "amigo!" and "yo!" guy actually wanted) make me feel physically threatened. I also worry that eg by ignoring "yo" guy, he's going to come charging up and grab me and say "don't fucking ignore me, you cunt" . (To which the abstractly correct response would be "don't fucking shout at me like that, you cunt", if physical violence concerns didn't exist .) I think in reality that is unlikely; if someone is determined to mug me they're going to do it regardless. So if I can manage it the correct response is to be polite but not allow myself to be detained (perhaps I could have called "lo siento" back at "amigo!" guy, on the offchance I had somehow done something he perceived to be rude - maybe he didn't hear me say "permiso", or something), and also to try to realise that these situations *almost* certainly don't pose a physical threat (some muggers may do an aggressive street vendor act to get a victim to stop etc, but most aggressive street vendors *are* simply going to be aggressive street vendors and won't offer a physical threat) and that acting as if they *might* is just going to make me more scared which will both ruin my holiday *and* probably make me give off more invitingly victimy body language and increase the risk.

Cartagena is apparently notorious for aggressive street vendors, so it may be better elsewhere, though I think Santa Marta may also have a bit of an issue.

On a side note, one of the exceptionally smug twats I found via my Google search for advice felt it was incredibly arrogant for people to leave a review of Cartagena, *the whole city*, on tripadvisor after visiting just the old centre for a few days. They're tourists, giving their tourist impressions on a tourist website for the benefit of other tourists. Perhaps strictly the title of the reviews should be " Tourist impressions of the most-visited tourist parts of Cartagena by other tourists", not a plain "Cartagena" , but I think it's pretty fucking obvious what is meant.

I do wonder if being alone makes me more sensitive to these mildly threatening people on the street. Of course, it may also be that I'm out of practice at being a tourist and dealing with these situations.

1820 So to recap I think my practical approach (if I can manage to implement it is) a) be polite but b) do not allow anyone to *stop* me, if I can be polite without stopping great but otherwise tough, I'm not stopping. Combined with c) don't assume any form of "hassle" is a precursor to mugging, it's completely counter-productive.

Did a bit of laundry (I think it helps to keep on top of things, especially as sinks are nearly always small, and I am trying to avoid washing underwear and "outerwear" together now) and will probably go out shortly. Bit edgy but it will be fine. Probably Plaza de la Trinidad, I will "accept" I may be politely bullied into handing over money to the odd street entertainer and am taking a handful of small bills which I'll keep in the knee pocket of my trousers where I'd have my camera during the day.

2208 Back home. The walk took *precisely* three minutes: should I really have taken a taxi? Streets were heaving.

Productive psychoanalysis session with Dr Hall, I feel.

So I'm a bit pissed; I went to Solar just opposite Cafe Trinidad and was initially peeved that a) Aguila (which I think I have been pronouncing incorrectly - a-gwee-la instead of a-gih-la - will check this with Odilia) cost 7k a bottle b) the waitress told me they didn't have that, only Aguila Light, and when I dithered I allowed her to upsell me on a half litre of BBC (Bogotá Brewing Company) lager at 12k c) after my first pint the waitress took it away while there was still a good swallow left. But still, I mellowed a bit when they apologised very nicely (changing the barrel) after massive delay in getting second "pint'.

Anyway, it wasn't a bad night. Bit of street entettainment, I felt a bit over-obliged to contribute but two rappers who did the table next to me (Harry Potter, what a surprise) left me alone except one made vaguely poisonous eye contact for some reason, prob gave about 8k over the night but OKish and most of it fairly voluntary.

I won't try to blog about it here and now but have been wondering if worrying about being mugged has a negative EV - really (*especially* since I have another phone back home to bootstrap eg Google account on a newly bought phone) the downside (assuming it's not psychologically devastating, after a day or two's recovery) is limited, and the downside *now* of continually worrying about it (never mind that " risk of mugging" vs "risk of mugging if i worry about mugging" are not necessarily that distinct, i.e. worrying may not even make me safer) are noticeable.

Anyway, I should maybe have come home earlier and given it was 12k a beer it was a pricey night (I asked and though didn't fully understand paying by card would have been more so paid 55k cash), it was quite fun in a self-meditative way. One of the street entertainers was a decent guitarist who did some English language and some Spanish songs, including that Hombres G one about "solo importa mi mujer" .

Wrt future travel plans, I am thinking I need to not get too stressed. For all my mixed feelings, I'll probably be back in Cartagena later in my life. Unless there's something personally MUST DO here which I've missed, I just don't need to get that worried. I've already got a billion regrets queued up for my deathbed, not visiting the Cheese Museum in Cartagena won't even get a look in. The mere fact that I'll *probably* return means I really don't need to worry about "sucking the town dry" in terms of tourism; it's *good* to save something interesting in case I do come back (as I probably wll).

I am not going to the palacio de la inquisicion or whatever it's called; yes the whole torture business (and this is one of top attractions in outdated guidebook) has a grotesque fascination but I am *not* going to succumb to it.

So I am thinking I will skim the guidebook to make sure there's nothing super-interesting I've missed, and I will then go ahead and plan to go to Santa Marta on Sunday and (assuming I can fly from SM, which I also need to check) that I won't return to Cartagena this trip.

(I mean, in terms of future visits, I already said the boat trip to Panama sounded cool if safe and I wrote it off cos I don't want to go to Panama now. So maybe in future, as a random example, I could travel from Panama *to* Cartagena.)

2234 No connection at all with any of my thoughts, but just listening by chance to HMHB "What made Colombia famous" , and vaguely cool I am currently in Colombia.

2303 Definitely a bit pissed. But did think earlier - not for first time - even the best meaning advice about "chance of getting mugged is minimal as long as you're careful" is ultimately unhelpful. "If you're careful" is the ultimate advice giver's get-out-of-jail-free-card. Was I "careful" tonight? Was a bit pissed but loads of people on street and hardly late at night. Was I "careful" walking stone cold sober in middle of day over to CSF *outside* the walled city and thus not in the tourist safe zone? Even ignoring my EV-ish calculations, it kind of feels like in reality there's maybe some blatantly stupid things (getting totally off your face miles from home) and then it's all a grey area where sensible is retrospectively defined as "nothing bad happened" .

On that note, I see all sorts of advice about not taking cabs off the street. In what sense is this dangerous? Are we talking about kidnap or murder, which based on what I've read is monstrously unlikely? Or are we talking about  being overcharged a bit, which TBH if you're drunk and/or nervous on the street somewhere and can "escape" the situation by taking a cab off the street seems like a pretty decent trade off? It feels like phrases like inadvisable and dangerous are thrown around carelessly, as though the reader will know what you mean, and for all the fact I'm probably a bit of a social idiot and incapable of appreciating these subtle distinctions the advice starts to feel a bit meaningless.

Thu 0013 I could say all sorts of drunken stuff but oddly enough what is coming to mind is (and I don't claim this is that relevant) a quote (sufficiently obscure I can't find it via a Google search) from the jacket of N F Simpson's "Harry Bleachbaker" , to the effect that "after a lifetime of pushing himself to the brink, he has decided to sit back and wait for the brink to come to him" . Insofar as I have a point, I'm thinking I should just stop giving so much of a fuck.

0035 Bed. Bit of a headache but meh. Running low on water so can't drink more. I must say considering how cheap this hotel is, it's impressive that they change the sheets *every single day* (and empty the bin in the bathroom with the dirty toilet paper in too). Yes, it's a sweaty climate, but still, they really don't have to be so pro-active about it and I think it's impressive.