Santa Marta, Monday

Mon 1440 Back at hostel. Feeling better but a bit mixed up.

Really didn't sleep all that well. Sort of finally woken up properly by very bright sunlight streaming in through (frosted) window. Got up a bit after 9, mouth dry as fuck, cleaned teeth and went down to reception to ask about breakast. There was a fair bit of dithering then someone took me up to terrace and gave me a menu and said options A-C were available for the free breakfast. Got option C, surprisingly good if not huge portion, an arepa with good scrambled eggs and a glass of fruit juice and a black coffee.

Incidentally one other room key was missing from the rack so maybe there is one other guest, I have no idea.

Was feeling a little better on terrace especially after food. Poked at guide book and Google Maps on phone. Misc thoughts:

- I picked out some Santa Marta tour agencies mentioned in outdated guide book for Ciudad Perdida to go ask about Cerro Kennedy, figuring they might at least be reputable.

- I saw at reception while asking about breakfast it's about 15k for a bus to Taganga (sp) and I can see on map it's very close. Think during breakfast and as morning progressed I formed a loose plan to maybe go to Taganga for a few days when my pre-booked time here is up, then come back here for a day or two. More on this below.

- Reading up on Ciudad Perdida in guide book and poking around on the web, the potential for encounters with spiders seems a bit higher than I'd like. While I'm not super confident I'd suspect my physical condition is adequate for the hike itself but this (eg someone mentioned showering in water closets festooned with spiders, these are quite possibly small-ish of the kind that made me evacuate that hostel in Guatemala not monsters, but still) aspect does put me off. I could imagine maybe coming back to this eg next year after trying to address this aspect. I was reading up on this in advance in case any of the agencies tried to switch my interest to a CP tour. There as also a mildly harrowing account of one tour where an apparently fit hiker guy was in agony with spasms for 1.5h for some ill-defined reason.

Anyway I then went out and spoke to those agencies. Neither of the two I'd identified from guide book did tours to Cerro Kennedy - I checked in the second one my pronunciation was correct and they did at least *know* of such a place in the area. I then tried another one next door which I think was a name I had seen in my web search last night; they spoke to me for a bit, made a phone call and escorted me round the corner to another tour agency, which was shut (and has been on the two occasions I've been past on my own since) - I thanked them and said I'd go back later and see if they were open.

As it happens a chap sitting outside another agency across street had hailed me and I spoke with him for a bit; the guide himself (apparently) turned up while we were talking (having been out when we first went into office to try to find him) and I then spoke with him a bit more. Essentially they do 2/3/4 day tours (something like 600/900/1xxxk respectively) with slightly different routes. I told the first guy I was scared of spiders and it seemed we dismissed one of the option, though to be fair guide turned up roughly at this point. Guide said that from that POV it's better to go in the dry season now, and if I understood correctly you might *see* some at a distance of a couple of metres but you might not, I asked and it's not hacking through the jungle and seeing them constantly, but he said there could always "be" some. Oddly it seems they would be willing to take me solo if there's no one else wanting to go that day for the same price, but rationally or otherwise I'd really kind of rather go with a group. There are apparently two Italians signed up for the 4 day (3 night) tour starting on 12th so that is a possibility.

You sleep in houses belonging to local (possibly indigenous) people but I asked and although of course he could be lying through his teeth the guide told me it's not the sort of place that's going to have spiders on the walls and stuff.

I then went and had a couple of americanos at Cafe Marley in PdlN (6.6k including 10% tip, and I could pay by card) and did a bit of web searching around this - I think I've found a website which is the same tour offered by that company with more details, I could e-mail and ask (I have their business card, though it doesn't give this website it is linked to from the Facebook page on business card) if I decide to go ahead - and mulled.

I am tempted by this 4 day tour. It sounds quite cool, it does include Cerro Kennedy AFAICT (or at least some 3000m peak called Cerro Kenya (?) which at the suspiciously similar height seems like the same thing by a different name), and it is maybe just that little bit outside my comfort zone which might make it a bit more "worthwhile". The idea of Ciudad Perdida is mildly tempting but given a) provided I do " something" significant, I am unlikely to have deathbed regrets about not doing CP b) I could quite possibly return and do it in a year or two (I could vaguely imagine a trip where I come to Colombia in January during dry season, then maybe onto Guatemala for Spanish study in eg Xela once the IIRC bitterer weather there in January starts to subside) when I have hopes of being less concerned about the spider angle, and getting older notwithstanding I think I could *potentially* be in better physical condition by then.

I don't need to decide today. I am kind of thinking I might try to speak to that other agency just as a comparison point before booking. Waiting until 12th to go with a group is not necessarily a bad thing; I could go spend 4-5 nights in Taganga and maybe relax and/or socialise there, then come back here for the tour. The extra time would also presumably help me acclimatise to the heat a bit more. As long as I feel afterwards I've done some "big ticket" items during this trip, I don't need to be haring around like mad trying to squash explicit activities into every day to make the most of the time, so I can afford to "waste" a few days semi-productively here, and I was probably going to try Taganga for a few days anyway.

I then went and found a restaurant (La Cucharita) on esplanade (fending off one guy who who asked "donde vas?" with an inconsistent "no, gracias" - he left me alone, and it was just one guy so not too disturbing) and had a pretty decent large churrasco. Sadly despite my thinking I had asked for the salad to be undressed (quite explicitly, not just tossing off "sin aderezo" and assuming it would be understood) it wasn't - I really do wonder if this is a language problem or the staff just CBA to avoid putting the dressing on. Other than that it was pretty decent, 29k including a (I nailed the word down thanks to the menu) *maracuyá* juice (= passion fruit) and as there seems to be no included tip I left 3k on the table. Had to pay in cash but not end of world.

I had been looking at GM a bit in restaurant and had been planning to go to gold museum in afternoon but GM said it was shut til tomorrow. The Ciudad Perdida museum was apparently open and just round the corner but I walked down calle 11 and couldn't see it and didn't like to have phone out in street to try to double check. I did stumble across the cathedral so went in there for a bit anyway, quite nice though to me there is always something pleasant-but-samey about these places.

Quite a few cops on streets for better or worse. I didn't generally feel too threatened though did cross street a few times to avoid walking past (small and probably harmless) groups of guys.

Anyway then came back to hostel and started writing this. I feel the afternoon is maybe being a little wasted but I don't know, it's probably OK. Wifi is being a bit ropy today but I just may see if I can have a Spanish lesson and then I think tonight I will risk going to PdlN (probably to Marley; 4.5k for an Aguila (plus 10% tip) is OK) for a *few* beers and come back to hostel no later than 9 or 10.

Oh, while I was having second coffee at Marley two women at adjacent table asked me to take their photo, turned into a mini photo shoot with them sending me out into the square a bit to get them from a different angle and do it with both their phones, but not really a problem and they did say thanks and I was keeping an eye on my coffee in case anyone tampered with it or stole it.

1558 Had a couple of looseish bowel movements, despite a fairly solid one this morning. Not *desperately* worried but not great. Could very well be down to lack of veg; when I've looked (in Cartagena) supermarkets seem decidedly thin on "eat without cooking" fruit and veg.

I can see from my balcony (ie balcony outside room door, not a private balcony) there is a presumably guest kitchen on lower floor, I feel super nervy about the prospect of using it but I might ask tomorrow - I could go out and get some rice and a bit of veg (if only tinned) and cook that up.

Small "plunge pool" is also below my balcony and does look vaguely tempting also but I think I'd never be confident enough to go use that (irrationally both *because of* and *despite* there being no other guests using it).

Can't quite believe it's so late already; while the afternoon may or may not be wasted, I haven't done any "slacking off" (books/YT) since I got back, only used bog twice and written this up and quick phone call back home. Still toying with Spanish lesson but wifi seems so ropy am dubious; may splurge some of my Three mobile data but need to get Priv charged up first.

2118 Back at hostel. Went out to Marley Bar (meh, other options tempting ish but that seemed OK and knew cheapish and could pay by card) a bit before 6pm. Am now up on terrace, a woman (ukulele player?) in hammock and a couple of guys chatting in Spanish in far corner, prob staff but who knows. Figured it's cooler up here and better than hanging around in room.

Walk back from MB absolutely totally un-terrifying. Really, it's probably a hundred metres or so, and bear in mind no cars (thus no taxis) right on PdlN either. There was a Brazil-Colombia Olympic U23 match on TV when I left, Colombia were 1 up but it obviously doesn't deeply interest me and I'd had enough beer (I wasn't *pissed* but I need to save my alcohol allowance for other nights). Was a group of prob mixed Brits-Irish-Americans at table next to me, though mercifully I heard little of their conversation - a woman who given her subject matter prob had an English accent talking about Rachel Riley and Sean (sp) Locke, and I think maybe I heard an Irish guy. TBH except for fact they're in a group and I'm not really didn't want to get involved in their conversation.

One of staff at MB obv spoke a bit of English and occasionally called me "Mister" . I toyed with telling him that wasn't quite idiomatic and he should say "sir" *if* he was going to do it, but decided it would be better to leave well alone.

Had 4xClub Colombia 330ml (all 4.7%, 2 roja, 1 negra, 1 dorada) and 2xAguila 330ml 4%. Paid on credit card, 31kish, which if not cheap is not super pricey either. Pretty busy, mix of white-ish prob Brits/mostly Americans and Colombians, square itself was busy and a few local entertainers  but no one as in-your-face as the rappers in Plaza de la Trinidad and I made a point of smiling as I politely declined the moderately excessive number of hawkers, gave a few coins to one or two streets acts - in general it felt far more pleasant and comfortable than PdlT.

Have mulled a bit over mugging etc. Prob slightly (only slightly) too pissed to really write about it, and TBH still feeling my way, but I think a big part of this is worrying about how I will feel/other [quite breezy in warm way up here, was - in pleasant way, mildly too warm but borderline pleasant - in PdlN too, but up here on terrace breeze is more intense] people will "judge" me if I'm mugged. It reminds me of a rugby book I have which IIRC says something about tackling to the effect that "if you really go for it, you won't get injured" which always strucks me as a bit of a self-justifying arse-about-face way to look at it - not that I *am*, but I picture some rugby novice getting injured tackling and smug fuckers saying "ah, if only you'd gone for it without holding back, you wouldn't have been injured" . Come on, maybe there's some truth in that, but you can't blame someone for trying but not quite getting it right. Similarly while obviously well-intentioned a lot of the anti-mugging advice is a bit OTT (was I *really* supposed to call a cab rather than walk home tonight?)

Obviously a big part of this is whether I should care. Easier said than done, but you can't guard against all risks and if you optimise for *zero* risk life becomes a tedious joyless chore.

As part of my slightly vague musings, it occurs to me that *financially* (not emotionally) I really shouldn't care about mugging. On a *very* generous assumption, I might lose £500 if I'm mugged. Let's say over my three month trip the "averagely cautious" persion has a 10% chance of being mugged - I suspect this is a massive overestimate given "most visits are trouble free" and while I'm a small single bloke, OTOH I'm sure many visitors do get totally pissed and/or drugged up and do *really* stupid things. And let's say "being really paranoid about being mugged" can (massively over-optimistically) take that down to 0%. So the EV of "being paranoid about being mugged" is £50. I'd rather not lose £50, but considering the joy-sapping quality of worrying about being mugged, if someone offered me an anti-mugging pill for £50 I'd bite their hand off.

(In reality I suspect the loss would be more like £200. I typically carry about £30 cash, there's a credit card which the average mugger is going to take but I'd cancel it (and I have many cards with me so on that basis can afford to lose one or two), my out-and-about phone cost me <£60 but might cost £100 to replace in a shop here.)

On this note getting mugged with *all* my belongings would be way more devastating and this would justify my proposed "be very paranoid in transit, fairly casual once I have a base where I leave my main bag" attitude.

Breeze really getting up but nothing worse than yesterday.

It's not a mugging subject, but I am leaning towards doing that four day hike. I don't need to rush into this and will see if I can speak to that other agency tomorrow.

Having felt bad about cooking and plunge pool earlier, I realise I have to do both to fight against this. Oldish (60?) bloke and his young daugher and a 20ish girl actually used the pool while was hanging around in my room this afternoon.

Touch wood I haven't felt bad despite worrying about health implications of loose stools earlier.

I will ask if I can use kitchen tomorrow and if as I expect they say yes I will check if basics like oil and salt (and a tin opener) are provided and buy some basic supplies at a supermarket after going out post-breakfast to the gold museum and trying to talk to that other tour agency which was shut today. I'll get some rice and veg of some description at a supermarket and cook that up; this will prob save a small bit of money over eating out but really it will be about a) having the nerve to cook in the hostel (though I have done this before several times on trip last year, I need to do it again simply *because* I felt so negative about it earlier) b) getting to eat a generous portion of veg for health reasons.

I will also make an effort to use the plunge pool albeit probably briefly, but first I need to check my swimming trunks in the sink and if they turn the water brown with residual mud from El Totumo I will consider that a sound excuse for not trying to use the pool here as I don't want to contaminate it.

It was quietly enjoyable having a few beers at MB tonight, I felt a little bit alone but not too much (and there were at least two other BNMs there too), and as there are lots of tables outside I never felt I was in the way. Did read a bit on phone but was mostly meditating-ish or looking around or listening to music, which was good.

Oh. I saw on Twitter it was palindrome day yesterday, shame I missed it but only just and I still feel oddly pleased to have noticed it (sort of).

Obviously I'm mildly pissed but on the whole feeling a bit more positive. I may not book for a few days (perhaps even via that website from Taganga, not in person here) but I think that trip will be OK, the risks seem mild-ish and I'll feel better in all sorts of ways for taking them and going ahead with it. CP still seems vaguely tempting but really I could do that next year or whatever with *much* less stress if all else goes to plan. (If nothing else, I could deliberately "train" for the exertion back in the UK before a CP-intending trip to Colombia next year.)

And while it *may* be I can't trust the guide, I'm sure there was a theoretical possibility of seeing something horrific in the spider line on those hikes in Guatemala last year - no one (and I'm thinking of the guide I spoke to today) can *rule out* seeing something disturbing, but they can (not to say he *is*) tell me truthfully that it's not like I'm going to feel like I'm stuck on the set of Fort Boyard the entire duration of the trip.

(And also, while I do *not* want to have any unpleasant experiences, seeing some big fuck-off monster of a spider in the jungle is to some extent better than seeing a UK-relatively-big fucker in my flat. I can and will walk past and ignore the jungle fucker, the one in my flat has to be *dealt with* because it's in my personal space, and the only person available to deal with it is me. It's - I speculate - a bit like how being mugged here in Colombia might be traumatic, but less so than being mugged in London, because I "have" to live in London, whereas if I feel Colombia is dangerous I can "ignore" it because I'm only here as a tourist.)

Incidentally had a bit of trouble getting into hostel tonight, the bell maybe doesn't work, a woman kept faffing around but didn't seem able to let me in personally. No big deal, I wasn't really pissed and it wasn't late and I didn't feel unsafe in the street, but a bit odd all the same.

So to perhaps repeat myself I don't feel too bad. Still a bit edgy re tour but I think it's probably a worthwhile risk and I don't need to decide for a day or two anyway. I will probably go to Taganga (sp) and see what it's like before doing the tour and maybe socialise and/or chill out, I also feel a bit better dispose to SM on the whole (not that I've ever felt *massively* down on it), it seems much nicer than Cartagena and also a little less touristy. Tomorrow is probably not going to be super eventful but I do want to challenge those stupid personal limitations I've been waffling about, and seeing the gold museum and chatting to that other agency about the tour seems like a reasonable "big"  accomplishment for the day. I'm doubtless waffling but I do need to avoid putting too much pressure on myself to do "big" things every day - if I spend a week in my room watching YT that's obviously genuinely wasting time, but it's a long trip and I'm not by nature a super-go-getting type so I should acknowledge that and be happy with a mostly relaxed, mostly happy, "quietly mostly doing stuff even if that stuff isn't legendary" attitude to travel.

FWIW I noticed a fridge of beer at reception this morning (there's not and never has been any sign of service at the bar up here on the terrace) so possibly (not that I wanted to tonight, otherwise I'd have had another at BM) I could buy a beer or two down there to drink up here on terrace if I wanted to. I might feel tempted to have a beer "somewhere" tomorrow, we'll see, but I do also need to exercise some moderation and I may well want to "save up" so I can have a few more drinks in Taganga (sp) or whatever.

2216 Wind is really giving it some, intermittently. Might go down and go to bed soon - quiet big day tomorrow. :-) I do feel really fairly OK, maybe this is just the influence of Dr Hall but all the same.

2253 Epic soak of swimming trunks in (shared) bathroom sink. They perpetually turn the water mildly translucent despite seemingly inifinite squeezing and rinsing, but they don't turn it brown and obviously if I'm *wearing* them they won't be getting so much squeezing. I may or may not risk them tomorrow, we'll see.

Did forget to say earlier - not to say that my thoughts on risk as written are useless - that maybe there's an emotionally inevitable period of nerviness about a "new" country with a mildly iffy security record (eg see my behaviour first few weeks in Guatemala vs later once I got a bit more at home) and that may be what's going on here in Colombia. This doesn't make thinking intellectually/semi-rationally about the appropriate attitude to risk pointless, it could well be useful, but it may well be it's novelty making me nervous and even if it *shouldn't* as the novelty fades I may naturally get less cautious (perhaps too much so, even).

Also, it may be the beer talking, but I feel a bit happier "socially" - I *can't* force social interaction (though yes, I can and should do what I can to make it more likely), what I can do is enjoy myself as best I can given the circumstances. And it's not that I don't enjoy a few solo beers, quite the opposite.

2304 Not exactly tired but will go to bed, I think.