Tbilisi-London

1145 At Stelzhen Haus. Wasn't going to drink but temptation on last morning too strong. Having pint of Weihenstephan unfiltered, orange juice, americano and a mixed grill. Very expensive but there you go.

Woke up about 730 with full bladder and bad-dreams-but-not-quite-nightmares about spiders. Went for piss eventually and drowsed until about 1040. Packed OK, though someone sat on top bunk across room with laptop all the time I did it. I thought it was only socially inadequate weirdos like myself who would do that.

Walked over here (with bag of course), bit of a trek but despite the slight pre-flight time worries I do in reality have loads of time. Apart from a pleasingish symmetry with this being the first place I came and now the last, I am not sure I know any closer places to eat where I can get something substantial. I was actually just going to have a plain hamburger and fries here but the waiter's English, while good, somehow didn't inspire me with the confidence I needed to trust that plain would mean plain. More of a concern than usual today of course since I don't have time to get a second decent meal.

Do have couple of Snickers bars and those small bags of peanuts still untouched in my bag. Will save those for the airport and/or on the plane though.

Didn't really feel hungover this morning, which was good.

Didn't charge phone overnight but managed to top it up this morning while packing, so I have two full batteries and one fairly dead one. Should be adequate, though need to be sure I get them all topped up back in London.

Weather sunny and only slightly cool. I am sat at my 'usual' table outside. Hotel California is playing very quietly.

Just checked wallet, I have 60 in notes. If I do get the orange juice and coffee this bill might come in about 50-60. That's OK as the bus is 0.50 and I have change. I have a 100 note stashed away as emergency reserve, though if I am panicking and need to get a taxi (supposed to be about 25) I'd rather not have to rely on the driver being willing or able to change it. Still, I do have plenty of time and I don't expect a problem with the bus and if there is one I *do* have money. Maybe I should break out the 100 note to pay this bill; that way I will have some smaller bills to maybe set one or two aside as souvenirs.

1229 Pretty good. Came with some vegetables so maybe I managed one or two of my five a day. Been to bog, mainly to extract that 100 note. Waitress inside recognised me, which I guess is nice.

I think my original order for coffee and orange juice got lost. Beer nearly finished, flight leaves in exactly four hours. It is half an hour by bus to the airport and the bus runs every half hour. I don't want to be there ultra mega early but equally I'd rather be bored there than panicking. I am tempted to get a coffee and the bill simultaneously.

Yes, just getting those.

Out of the blue occurs to me it would have been nice to go to that puppet theatre thing where the weird clock tower was. Another one for the todo list when I come back.

GEL 45.54 including 10% service charge. Might leave a coin or two if I get any in change. Am paying with that 100.

GEL46 by time they rounded the change. Perhaps stupidly have left 1.50 extra. (They gave me 2xGEL2 coins, but I got some change out of pocket as a rather dumb attempt at resisting the implicit (probably imaginary) coercion to leave a GEL2 tip.) Meh, hardly matters really. But I do feel a bit bad about brushing off the old geezer who came trying to flog me flowers somehow, when viewing it from this perspective. Man I hate tipping, it's so fricking complicated.

The above reminds me that another thing which hasn't gone so well is trying to continue to eat a bit of fresh fruit; apart from the odd banana, glass of orange juice or litre carton of grapefruit juice I haven't done so well there. In part it's the 'need' to wash most fruit after purchase, when I seldom have a bottle of water on me while out and about where fruit is being sold. Maybe in Thailand and India with it being hotter I will be more likely to have water on me most of the time.

Suddenly though about 'Allo 'Allo for no really obvious reason. Was it the big 90s storm the upcoming one is being compared to where Gordon Kaye got hit by a falling tree or something? No matter, thinking of 'Allo 'Allo makes me smile, which is good

1250 Finished coffee. Sort of seems too early to go but no point pushing it. Off.

1304 At bus stop. 37 due in 4 mins with luck.

1309 On bus. Driver having a fag. :-)

Sign at bus stop said 25 degrees C. It is warm in the sun.

1352 At airport. As I observed on arrival you have to go through security (bag scan, metal detector) to get in. They don't provide trays for your loose items, you leave them on a table. Meh. Still, not too rude and not a big deal.

1413 Been to bog. Decided I will check my main bag in, because on top of the wanky 7kg baggage limit the wanky security rules here prohibit scissors (full stop, not the 6cm blade rule the UK has) and - the horror! - NAIL FILES. Obviously I could try it on or throw them away but neither seems a great option, especially when I might be refused on weight grounds anyway. I don't know if my bag will be checked in for me to pick up in Kiev or London; I suspect the former, and I guess I sort of prefer that, as long as we're not late into Kiev. That way there is a slim chance (unlikely) I will be able to take it as cabin baggage on the flight to London if the security rules are less wanky in Kieiv, thereby avoiding the extra delay at the London end. Even if that doesn't happen I'd probably feel safer knowing the bag surfaced in Kiev and was handed in for transit on to London instead of relying on internal routing.

I appreciate bitching about insane security rules is hardly novel but it passes the time. Fuckers.

I am not sure if my razor blades would be prohibited or not, probably.

Rather brusque young woman at the check in desk (probably her non-native English more than anything else) told me I can check in for the Kiev flight in 30 minutes.

I might leave the nail scissors (and the rather redundant bandage cutting ones in the little 'first aid' kit) and the tweezers and the razor behind in future. I suppose I need to check the hand baggage allowance for the flight to Bangkok; if it's so low I can rely on being allowed to fly hand baggage only then maybe I won't bother. (Though I should probably take e.g. the redundant scissors out, so it's slightly less annoying if I do have to throw stuff out to comply with rules in future.) Although if nail files are truly prohibited I might as well just give up.

I'm less comfortable than usual having to check my bag in with this not being a direct flight, that seems to vastly increase the risk of the bag going astray. But as I say, I suspect I will have to pick it up personally in Kiev anyway. I'm sure that will be fun.

1430 Forgot there was free wifi here til phone autoconnected. Bit ropy but better than nothing. Jet Airways have a cabin baggage allowance of 7kg *for first class*. Oddly they don't mention a maximum weight for economy, but I think it's safe to assume 7kg. FFS. Maybe I can weigh my bag after I repack back in London but I don't think I can hit 7kgs. (If not I kind of need to go and purchase checked baggage allowance for that Air Asia flight to Singapore too.) Maybe I will make it, let's see. Not a problem now as such, except that I'm bored.

Oh, now I'm no longer there will say I was at Why Not? hostel in Tbilisi. (Though saying it was behind the Marriott was a bit of a giveaway, if I could only remember why it's not smart to reveal this information *anyway*.)

1434 I think check in is being called for Kiev. Yes, it is.

1442 OK, the bag is checked through all the way to Gatwick. Looking on the bright side, this is one less source of stress is
delays do make the connection in Kiev tight. If you trust the baggage conveyor weighing machine, my bag was 7.3kg but this is with the daypack removed with a few bits and bobs in (and the laptop, though that doesn't count towards the 7kg allowance). So if I do leave the extra pair of shoes behind and see if there's any other fat I can trim maybe there is some chance of getting to 7kg and being allowed to fly hang baggage only even on these super-stingy airlines. I guess leaing the scissors, razor and nail files behind might trim a few grammes off.

Oh, she printed me some boarding passes off anyway. Still, she seemed fairly pleasant this time unlike before.

Anyway, let's go get security over with.

1450 Hmm. Just passport control and now I'm in the area with the gates. Presumably the security check on entering the airport is instead of rather than additional to the usual check to go airside. Is a bar (EFES Beer Port) here but I think I will try to resist its charms.

Gate just called and mentions security check at gate. Let's see what happens. Given I don't intend to go to the bar as long as there's a bog I don't have any major problem if I do get 'stuck' the other side of a security checkpoint at the gate. Let's at least go have a look.

1500 No, the gate is right here and there is the usual security apparatus and it also looks a bit like there might be no bog that side. No one else has gone through yet (the wall is glass) and given boarding isn't till 1630 I am inclined to sit out here until either say 1600 or when I see a big queue building up at the security point.

1529 OK, through security at gate. I was a bit confused, flight is 1630, boarding 1600. A queue was starting to form at security and also a second announcement about going to the gate added, rightly or otherwise, a sense of urgency. No problems at security, I managed not to set off the metal detector.

Disposed of all but a handful of Georgian coins in the charity boxes airside before coming through security. I am such a nice chap. Just kept one or two of each denomination, frankly they will just sit in a drawer somewhere but they are a kind of souvenir and giving most of it away reduces the bulk. The chances of me remembering to bring the coins with me when I come back are virtually nil, so in reality it would just be more junk to store if I'd kept the lot.

Very warm here in the glass-walled gate area with sun beating down.

1602 On bus waiting to go to plane. I could swear the announcer, in English at least, keeps transposing digits of flight and gate numbers. Some enormously fat fuckers on this flight. Not many real porkers, but a few and some moderately chunky ones.

There is a plane 'hooked up' directly to the adjacent gate, so obviously not all flights require a bus link. There are clearly not hundreds of flights, so I am a bit surprised, but doesn't really matter of course.

1619 On plane (Embraer 190, not 737, so it is 2-and-2 seating - which is good). Waited ages on bus, then drive to plane something like 30 seconds. We could have walked it, but safety/security I am sure. Seatmate not a porker, so all good.

1705 Been given microscopic cup of tea and a gas-packed baguette; I see white slop inside the baguette, so will leave it unopened. Had one of the Snickers bars instead, not that I was mega hungry. Tea went down nicely, just a shame it was so small.

1839 (still Tbilisi time) Think we are landing in 30-40 mins. Flight stuffy and too warm, even with my air blower on. Felt sleepy, dozed, not sure if really slept much or not.

1916 (Tbilisi). On bus waiting to be taken to the terminal at Kiev. Weather cool, but quite welcomely so. Think it's 1816 here but will wait until get into terminal before changing time zone, don't want to somehow miss next flight by getting it wrong.

1846 (Kiev). At gate D9 waiting for flight (2005). Security checkpoint for transit passengers as in Warsaw; maybe it's so long since I've been in transit I'd forgotten this, or they didn't do it last time I was in transit. Not exactly fast but faster and less in-your-face than in Warsaw; I didn't set the metal detector off for no reason here. I thought I had more than 2h between flights here but it's actually more like 1h 50.  ebookers email says 2h10, we were due to land 1755 (Kiev time I assume), so looks like we were late in. Not a problem as it happens. Also the email does say 737 for both flights; given the seating plan I'm expecting a 190 on the next flight too. Not that I'm complaining - 2+2 seating is way more civilised than anything involving banks of three, and I may imagine it but the seats seem wider than on a 737.

This is clearly a much larger, busier airport than Tbilisi

Battery at 68%; didn't listen to any music on flight (just had noise cancelling headphones on to reduce noise) and been reading Atlas Shrugged on the Nook, so demands on battery been minimal.

We apparently get 'breakfast' on this next flight. I'm not too fussed; I have my second super-sized Snickers, my unappetising packets of peanuts and I think there's a takeaway pizza with my name on it back in London as well. Something to drink would be nice; I'm not desperate enough to withdraw a chunk of otherwise useless Ukrainian cash just to buy a bottle of water though. (And equally I'm not trusting my credit card at an airport.) I have the extra strong mints I bought at Heathrow on the way out if I do get thirsty.

Wow, free wi-fi here too.

1921 Twat here at gate is playing music out loud on his tablet. Wankstain.

1932 On bus waiting to go out to the plane.

1959 Just got on plane. Waiting on bus for ages. The seating plan was a complete fiction, this is 3+3 seating so joy of joys I get a middle seat as I am in 8B. I had been thinking before that I should have preferred a seat C as in case of precisely this kind of mix up I would be more likely to end up with aisle seat. I might super-optimistically hope because of this 'change' of plane that no one will be in 8A, but that's unlikely I guess. Meh, it's OK. I feel fine, just hope I don't get a porker sat to my left (woman in 8C is OK), at least this should reassure me of my ability to handle middle seat.

OK, there is no one else in this row, so I've moved to window seat on suggestion of woman in 8C. Still prefer my aisle seat but 8B was OK and this is better. I hope we're not going to be significantly late into London, given it's 2002 now and we're due to takeoff at 2005. I think boarding is complete. Let's fucking move, people, there's a 15" deep pan American Hot waiting for me!

2024 Seatbelt sign off. I must have terrible BO, the woman from 8C has moved to 7D, so I have the row to myself. Suspect every bank of 3 has no more than 2 occupants as it was booked based on the 2+2 seating plan, may be wrong. Slightly offended about her moving but not my problem. I don't think I smell that bad; I had a shower yesterday. I may be a bit smoky from last night, but who knows. Anyway, not my problem.

1851 (London). Bit bored.

1912 Just had 'breakfast'. The hot part seemed to consist of rice with some strange yellow sauce; had I know what it was I might have tried it, but on a plane with limited liquid to get taste out of my mouth should it be foul and not feeling particularly hungry anyway I left it. Had a bread roll with butter and a small slab of chocolate cake type thing, and small cups of orange juice and tea.

We're due in at 2135. Fingers crossed.

1925 Woohoo. Long largely inaudible announcement but our forecast arrival time is 2150. Not the end of the world, but takeaway pizza places aren't open all night.

2110 Can see city lights out of window. Some announcement about landing soon. Listening to some music and trying to doze, don't think managed it. Can't see how to make seat recline, which is bit embarassing but no big deal.

2145 Just landed.

2207 Been waiting for baggage reclaim for a few minutes. Still, a screen says next FCC (ie affordable) train is 2247 so fingers crossed I will get that, and if I didn't have to wait to reclaim my bag I'd have got the same train anyway.

2217 Still no reclaim number for our flight. Still, it's well worth it - no one pulled a nail file on me during the flight, and the overhead bins weren't strained by my 8kg baggage. The 2247 recedes into the unlikely future. It's OK, I would guess there'll be another train half an hour or so after that.

2237 On platform 4 (which is excruciatingly poorly signed) with ticket for London Bridge and bags, waiting for 2247.